


Jellicle Joyride

by ZombieCatTookMyPudding



Category: Cats - Andrew Lloyd Webber
Genre: Action/Adventure, Don't Try This At Home, Gen, Humor, Joyride - Freeform, POV Third Person, This wouldn't work in real life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-10-28
Packaged: 2019-03-22 13:48:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13765455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZombieCatTookMyPudding/pseuds/ZombieCatTookMyPudding
Summary: Bill-Bailey gets an idea to start up the old car to see if he and his friends could take it for a joyride! Most of the kittens and adolescents are excited to help, but of course, the older and/or more mature cats aren't as keen on this plan as they are, and certainly won't make it easy for them to succeed...





	1. Chapter 1

"Hey, Bill-Bailey!" a cream, white, and black-coloured adolescent tom called from the dumpster bin. "Check out all this neat trash! Honestly, who knew humans would throw so much away? We could make quite a stash."

But his brown-and-white littermate wasn't listening. Instead, he was sitting there thoughtfully, watching the cars go by. Of course, being such a chaotic young cat, it was rare he ever did such a thing. Yet, something about those cars seemed to really catch his attention.

"...BB? Is there something interesting you see?"

"Pouncival…do you think we could get that old car in the Yard to work?" he asked. "With some electricity and fuel, I bet we could get it to perk. Humans drive these all the time. I want to drive one too, I bet it would be fine. Just as soon as we can get it to jerk."

"Hm, I suppose I've never thought about that." He jumped down next to him. "Perhaps we could ask Mr. Mistoffelees, the conjuring cat."

* * *

"No," the elegant, sparkling black tom glared at them.

"Why not?" Bill-Bailey asked, somewhat disappointed. "You're the great magical Mr. Mistoffelees, a big-shot!"

"Certainly, I _could,_ but that doesn't mean I _should."_ He waved them off. "You both smell awful, and I won't help you engage in anything unlawful. Off to a bath you go!" With a zap of his paws, the two toms found themselves gasping and coughing from the smoke. Well, at least they were cleaner, now. With a scoff, the aloof tom trotted away over one of the many scrap piles.

"Fine. We'll just have to get it ourselves," Bill-Bailey said as he shook shook himself. "How hard could it be? All we'd have to do then is sneak some power from Macavity."

"Have you gone _mad?!"_ Pouncival snapped. "Mum would kill us if she knew we were anywhere near our dad!"

"Oh, Pouncival, don't be so grim, maybe we won't have to be the ones to go anywhere near him. With a call and a yelp, I can think of some friends who might want to help."

* * *

"Alright, I'd betcha we could do it. It would only take a minute," the calico tom nodded.

"Just one question-" his twin sister continued, "-what's in it for us? That's what we _really_ need to discuss."

"Perhaps the two of you would like to tag along, in our joyride that would go on rather long." Bill-Bailey suggested.

"Hm, that does sound like fun..." the female of the two commented.

"In that case, consider it done!" the male stood up. "Rumpleteazer?" he raised an eyebrow mischievously.

"Mungojerrie?"

"Away we go! The dynamic duo combo!"

_"Ahem."_

"Oh, and you two too."

"Don't think we would've forgotten about you, do you?"


	2. Chapter 2

The four of them were hiding behind a crate, about ten tail-lengths away from Macavity's warehouse.

"Alright, here's the plan: the two of you sneak up and get one of the generators nearby the fan." Mungojerrie began. "Old Lady Griddlebone is watching the warehouse for a while, but we'll distract her, so she won't be so hostile."

"Just know we may have to drop the dialogue." Rumpleteaser's ears flattened sadly. "Their instincts are like a guard dog." Perking up again, she added. "Hopefully, this will askew their suspicion, giving you time to finish your mission."

"Sounds fine with me, we won't tell anyone." Pouncival chimed. "Besides, you're just helping us have a little fun."

"Thanks, we knew you'd understand." Rumpleteaser started.

"Let's hope this goes as planned!" Mungojerrie finished.

* * *

Sneaking through the back door, the two toms marveled at the sight in front of them: they had never been so close to their father's warehouse before, let alone inside of it. Though the only exciting thing that was going on appeared to be a transport of various stolen valuables, they felt a thrill in their chests from being where the most dangerous cat they knew lived. Strangely enough, it seemed Macavity wasn't in the room. Only an old white queen was yowling out orders to the minions below.

"Mungojerrie!" the calico tom leaped up on a crate behind her.

"And Rumpleteaser!" his sister followed.

"REPORTING FOR DUTY!" they finished in unison. The white queen whipped around.

"You two?!" she snapped. "You're not supposed to be on duty 'till tonight!"

"Yeah, we know, but, we thought it might be nice to do our rounds early for a change. You know, REALLY help out the team, huh?"

"Well...fine, I suppose if you two idiots _really_ want to make yourself useful, go help Augustus, James, and Peter move that crate of diamonds over there."

"Whatever you say, boss-man!" Mungojerrie called out. She glared at him. "Oh, er, sorry, boss-woman?"

"Just...go," she grumbled, holding the bridge of her nose in her paw.

"Right, got it." Rumpleteaser purred cheerily as she and her brother leaped off of the crate.

"Come on, hurry! We may not have much time!" Pouncival whispered urgently.

"Right behind you, brother of mine!"

Sticking her nose up in the hair, Griddlebone's hackles were raised. "Someone else is here..." she growled. Thinking quickly, Rumpleteaser broke a board on the crate, causing all of the diamonds to fall out.

"Oops!" She rolled her eyes, pretending to be innocent.

"Oh great!"

"Nice going, butter paws!"

"Do you how long it took us to get all of those in that crate?!"

"Enough bickering! Everyone, pick up those diamonds, now!" It seemed the Persian queen was so preoccupied with managing her fellow lowlifes, she had forgotten all about the intruders.

The door to a closet in the back of the warehouse was open.

"There they are, the generators!" Pouncival rushed over to a small box nearby a running fan. "I think we'd only need one. If we need more, we can worry about it later, but I think for now we're done."

Just before Pouncival could unplug it, there was a shadowy figure, his strong paw stopping him. Through the crack of the door, the two toms could see an all-too-familiar ginger pelt, with disapproving red eyes glaring at them.

"And just _what_...do you think you're doing?" he growled sternly.

"Oh, uh, hey, Mister...Macavity, sir." Pouncival's ears twitched nervously. "We were just wondering if we could uh, borrow one of your generators...take it for a stir."

"I'm going to regret this but for what, may I ask?"

"We have an operation of our own going on. Just let us take it and we'll be gone."

"Hmm..."

"Sir!" a dark gray Bengal tom burst through the door. "It's the jewels! Those dimwit twins keep messing up the whole thing!" Ears flattened, Macavity raced to the door and looked out. All of the various gems and treasures had fallen to the floor, leaving many of the cats to trip over and slip on the damage.

"Oh, fine!" he turned back around to face them. "I'm only letting you take it because I don't have time to argue with you. Use it for what you may, but bring it. Right. Back. If not, my henchcats will have to take it from you."

"Yes, sir! Understood, sir!" Bill-Bailey saluted. Macavity rolled his eyes and left the room.

Working together to unplug the generator and lift it out of the warehouse, Bill-Bailey and Pouncival looked back only to see Mungojerrie and Rumpleteaser give them a "thumbs-up". Looks like all was going according to plan.


	3. Chapter 3

"Look at that! A perfect fit! I knew that we could do it!" Bill-Bailey declared after he and Pouncival carefully replaced it with the one they had gotten from Macavity.

"Let's see if we can start it!" Eagerly climbing into the car, Pouncival and Bill-Bailey still found the broken key jammed into the keyhole...but no matter how hard they turned it, it wouldn't start. "...It's not moving," Pouncival's ears flattened with disappointment. "Not one little bit."

"Wait:" Bill-Bailey came to a realization, "cars need fuel, right? So let's go back to our owner's house and see if she has some in the garage, so we can get this baby to _light!"_

"While we would get what we need, I'm not entirely sure we'd succeed," Pouncival frowned skeptically.

"Why not? It's worth a shot."

"Yes, but think about Jennyanydots: she keeps an army of mice and cockroaches...lots and lots."

"Then let's wait until no one's guarding the garage, and there we can make a break. It's definitely a risk I'm willing to take."

* * *

Despite living with twelve other members of their family, the house was unusually quiet when they got inside. It looked like it was nap time.

"Perfect! Now's our chance! Let's get in and out before anyone can get another glance," Bill-Bailey whispered as they snuck through the foyer. Out of all the doors, the inside garage door was the hardest to open, but Bill-Bailey already had a plan. "Let me stand on your shoulders," he instructed Pouncival, "let's see if we can get to the fuel's holders."

Without question, Pouncival did as he said.

Bill-Bailey fidgeted with the doorknob, but it was thick and slippery through his paws. "Not going to quit...just...got to...get it!" Just as he got the doorknob to budge, he slipped off of Pouncival's shoulders, both of them crashing into the tile beneath them.

A tense silence hung in the air before Pouncival finally spoke: "we've made quite a ruckus. Do you think anyone heard us?" Another pause and a simultaneous breath of relief seemed to indicate that they didn't.

"Yup." That was, until, their cousin, Tugger "Street Cat Tuggah" Jr. spoke. He was accompanied with his littermates, Jemima and Sillabub. "Sup?" he asked.

Untangling themselves, Pouncival was the one to answer: "now that you're here, we could use your assistance, just in case the grown-ups offer any resistance." 

The three younger kittens exchanged glances. The two females smiled and nodded, and Jr. was the one to speak on their behalf: "it must be good if you were willing to disturb our naps in a snap. We've got curiosity tickling, so now we're listening."

* * *

After briefly explaining their plan, they rounded up Carbucketty, Tumblebrutus, Electra, and Etcetera to help them find the fuel and carry it out, with of course, the promise of them joining if they succeeded.

"Seems pretty straightforward," Bill-Bailey began, "all we need to do is grab the can, open the door, and leave before anyone else can ruin our plan."

The words were met with cheers from the other kittens, but were soon stopped by a sharp, reminding "shh!" from Jemima. 

But the plan was easier said than done: not only did the car take up most of the garage, but it was cluttered with all kinds of shelves and other unnecessary things from the rest of the human family that lived here with their owner kept; things that were easy to trip over and break, things that got in the way of the red gas container, certainly full enough to go for a ride...and things loud enough to wake the once-sleeping adults upstairs.

* * *

Well, just one, really: Demeter, Bill-Bailey, Pouncival, Carbucketty, and Tumblebrutus' mother, and a very light sleeper. Everyone else had stayed up late that night and were too tired to hear the kittens making trouble downstairs. Easily anxious, her heart raced at the unknown sound. Hackles raised, she padded out of the room, careful not to wake the others who slept on their owner's bed.

* * *

"What is going on here?!" Oops. They forgot to close the inside garage door behind them. Now they had to deal with a very concerned Demeter.

"Hi, mum!" Bill-Bailey greeted her cheerfully. "We're just getting some fuel, that's all. No need to be such a bum."

"Don't you talk to your mother that way!" she scolded. "And I won't let you get that over past the driveway!"

"Yo! No need to cause a fuss. Besides, by now we're so far, I don't think there's any way you can stop us!" Tugger Jr. guffawed.

But, just as if he tempted fate, hordes of mice and cockroaches burst through the garage door, quickly flying past the screaming and yowling kittens' feet while forming a blockade at the door. Soon coming up beside Demeter was Jennyanydots, a surly look on her plump face.

"What, but, how would you know-" Demeter began.

"It's a motherly instinct, dearie," Jennyanydots meowed interruptingly. "Besides, I heard everything: sleep is for the weak and weary. TROOPS! Take the gasoline and scatter the children! And don't stop until all of it is hidden!"

All that could be heard was squeaks, squeals, and the terrified mews and yowls of the kittens as they looked for escape. Etcetera, the most acrobatic one of the group, successfully hit the garage door button, and allowed her and the others to escape. Looking back, they could see the gas tank being put back in its place, and a hand formed by the mice and cockroaches closing the garage door behind them, Jennyanydots and Demeter glaring at them the whole time while they were at it.

"Oh no. We didn't get the fuel!" Bill-Bailey exclaimed. "Didn't even come within a landslide! Now how are we going to go for a ride?"

"Ahem." The group turned to find Rum Tum Tugger, standing confidently with a large red container. "Figured she'd keep some in the shed, so I'd stop by and see, while you were busy being having to flee."

Beaming, Bill-Bailey ran up and hugged Tugger, others following. "Thanks, Uncle Tugger! You're the best!" Upon letting go, he added, "I really am quite impressed."

"I know," he responded vainly, stroking some of his silky mane. "Now what are we waiting for? Let's go!" 


End file.
